I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Never let your siblings swipe right.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
