Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Let's get the cat blown out
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
