I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
