You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
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