when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
