Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
