I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I have fence marks all over my body
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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