AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
My breasts were aching with rage.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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