Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
