and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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