I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize