its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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