Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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