But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
