You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
