What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
