What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
i think i scared a bird with my dick
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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