did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
why does every cop we meet know your name?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize