Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
