Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Pants 0. Shit 1.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
