I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
my shit smells like andre
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
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