Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
