So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
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