The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
