clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
