ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
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