it hurts more in the daytime
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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