i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize