Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
