So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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