would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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