Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Randomize
