Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
