I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
