just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
