I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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