dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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