I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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