that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize