Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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