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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.

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• (705): View more from Ontario

  i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever

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• (585): View more from New York

  aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"

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• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us

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• (315): View more from New York

  That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.

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• (518): View more from New York

  We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  I think I hear the ice cream truck

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I could be going crazy though

  (410): View more from Maryland

  NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.

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