i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
