And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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