problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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