You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
