I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
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