So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
