My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Randomize
