i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize