it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
