We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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