Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
A+ Viking dick
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize