My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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