like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize