On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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